Love Sex Aur Dhoka (LSD) Camera Print
Director: Dibakar Banerjee; Cinematographer: Nikos Andritsakis
Duration: 01:33:10; Aspect Ratio: 2.375:1; Hue: 180.579; Saturation: 0.061; Lightness: 0.395; Volume: 0.284; Cuts per Minute: 17.710; Words per Minute: 58.582
Summary: In 2010, Dibakar Bannerjee made a film 'Love, Sex, Dhoka' that aside from being about the perfidies of love, murder, sex and betrayal, is also about making images. LSD has no SRKs and Katrina Kaifs - the stars literally are Digital Video Camera, Surveillance Camera and Hidden Camera. The film divided into three loosely-linked tales is shot from the perspective of a video camcorder (Love), a store security camera (Sex), and concealed cameras used for a journalistic sting operation (Dhoka). The rest of the ensemble cast seems to be ordinary people caught in the choices, traps and ironies posed by image-making technology.
LSD captures the ease of production possible with digital technology, but also the murky underbelly of such production - pornography, sting videos, videos of violence, rape, killings and so on. This oddly compiled pirate print that neither begins, nor ends with the film is already annotated with voices from the audience. It belongs to that murky underbelly of the internet of kaand videos and pirate circulation.
In the pirate copy, what becomes apparent is an inverse of the director's commentary track on DVDs. A vocal public engagement with the film, or the intimate and sexual interaction with the film and amongst the audience, is caught on camera and distributed through this cam-print of a movie, that is self referentially about cameras.
This camera is the key to treasure
Its come. Jai Balli.
This looks like Doordarshan
A thief will look like my uncle, my uncle will look like a thief
The country doesn't want service, it wants prime time entertainment
Who should I show it to, then?
You'll kiss her for the camera
Cut! Why are you showing your acting to the camera?
I made the government fall with THIS camera.
Go child, go. Live your life.
Sorry yaar, what was the line?
- Adarsh, the camera is looking.
Hi, hello, how are you? - what else will you say?
Love, sex and betrayal
Put some masala. Like an item number
Item number? But Sir, ours is a family love story film.
But son, how does a family become a family after all?
You have to put something extra into it, you understand, right?
Is the camera still on?
When you become a big director, you'll have 5-6 cars like this.
Papa, I'm coming
He's the one hurt, but you are having pain.
Thats it, lets shoot now. Aaaand rehearsal. Action!
I have to go home
No, no. Shruti - the line is "No, Raj, Nooo". Action!
Its the first time, I'm touching.. such a big car. Mercedes, you know.
Should I call Chand's wife, Sujata?
- You shut up!
I can't do this
This is all because of your retakes.
What is it?
You will show this place like a palace
Papa, this boy has come from the (film) institute
I've come to look at location for shooting
-What? What for shooting?
For my diploma film, Uncle
I need a location like a palace
Is this a camera?
It is a palace, Uncle
- Wow, Sir. Cover this, cover.
- Italian marble
Shoot in style. Chandelier
- Wow, Sir
Put the chandelier on! Shoot it. Now see the elephant
Your cameraman is not quick. See horse.
- Horse, shoot shoot horse.
Myself, my painting
- Wow, Sir. What hair you had.
Arrey, I'm interested in art
- Sir, it shows.
I know Shahrukh
- Khan, Sir?
Who else? Shahrukh Chopra?
We put the marble in his bungalow
I did lots of different roles in college.
- Police, driver, army, navy - many roles
Sir, will you play the role of a father?My son- Atul. 6 feet.
- What are you shooting now?
Now you're saying - Do a role, do a role.
- Can I say something, Sir? You sound like Amrish Puri on the camera
Who is the hero?
- the Kapoor?
No, no Sir. Shahid Querishi
He has a big shop in the market
Sir, if you are the father, then choose your daughter as well
Do you want to do?
Bollywood style mohabbat
Who else is in your house?
- Thats it. Mother
Your mom must be so proud of you. You also got scholarship.
That I got for being special case.
Special case! We are a special case. If we hadn't been, I would still have got scholarship.
Do you have a girlfriend?
Do you have a boyfriend?
What is his name? Do I know him?
You tell me your girlfriend's name
My girlfriend doesn't know that she is my girlfriend
(Person in audience): Chutiya actor
(Person in audience): Stupid
What do you mean?
Shruti, whats his name, yaar?
(Person in audience) Chillar
Did you write it?
(Person in audience) Write it down fast, chillar
Ready, steady, go
The film LSD (Love, Sex, Dhoka) is shot from the point of view of various cameras and so plays with what we see, and also hear. The voice that seems most intimate in the first story of the film, is the voice of the young boy who looks like a RAhul, shooting the student film with a digital camera (Rahul). He shoots his life almost continuously, and his murmured undertones that are audible to the audience are whispered confessions of love for the girl and chatty banter with the camera. Occasionally his breathing and presence is almost an embodiment of the camera.
The bootleg copy layers this experience further with the chaos of many different voices inside the theater. What seems initially to be just men, and their raucous cheering, can be broken into individual voices and even personalities that are discernible. The far-away horny bastard in the corner of the theater, the worried camera person who records sporadically and occasionally berates others in the audience and calls them 'bleedy idiots', the one who cackles almost continuously, the one who only cheers for sex, the one who complains about the heat in the cinema hall and so on.
(Audience cheers) Go
(Person in audience) My name could .. (inaudible)
Shruti... I love you too
Come, we have to go ..
(Person in audience) Rewind this part once more
Turn, turn, will she turn?
(Person in audience) She's turned!!
She's going to say she doesn't want to go home, she wants to go somewhere with me
Papa is calling you
- Go then, go quickly
Not me. He's calling you
What is it?
(Person in audience) Slippers inside water
Your film is very vanilla.
Put some spice, like an item number
- Item number?
Sir! ours is a family love story
But beta (son), how does a family become a family?
You need that.. something...do you understand?
That something doesn't fit in our story
Arrey beta(son), I can make it fit
For instance, the mehendi ceremony and there is a mujra (cabaret) there too
Mehendi is for weddings, Sir. Here she runs away from home to get married
Change the story, sisterfucker, fool. Stuck on that silly story, fools.
How can I change the story, now?
- Shruti's wedding has been fixed. Its not a joke, okay?
The family is from Canada. We told them the girl is an actress.
They got impressed.
They started saying - show us the shoot.
We said, its happening in our house. What do you want to see?
So they said - song sequence.
Now you put a song or find another heroine.
I can't hold it any longer (2)
The prince has gone up now.
He has become a man now.
He needs love
eff. o, eff. o, eff. o
My loved one is weeping,
my neighbour is weeping
my husband is weeping ..
He is jealous, when I come to meet you
eff.o, eff.o, eff.o
This is the director, Rahul. And this is Canada
Hi, dude. This is so cool.
(Person in audience) What happened? Is it off?
(Person in audience) Pick it up
(Rahul:) I love you, Shruti
(Person in audience) He (father) will take off this boy's pants
I am Rajesh, speaking from Bhogal.
Come here, bastard. I won't leave you till you are finished.
I will cut you into pieces and throw you........
Oh my love.. oh someone, save us,
What did you think when you came here?
That you will take away my sister. You dogs.
Are you mental? Why are you hitting for real?
- I'll break your arms and legs, asshole.
Sir, I swear on my father, mother, on God.
Shruti is like my sister. I don't even know her number.
And you were hugging her in front of everyone
- That was acting. We don't touch. See!
Its his voice only. I can recognize it anywhere
Rahul, why don't you say something?
Sir, what can I say... what can I say..?
Do you have a cold?
No, Sir. After saying Action, Cut so often, my throat is sore.
Sir, he was home last night. He can't call from the Institute.
I'm swearing on father, mother and God, Sir. Sister is like God.
Maybe it was a wrong number
- It must be a wrong number, Sir.
Sir, I'll call and you see - we get crossed lines sometimes
- You long haired, monkey, it was you!
Okay, now keep quiet
Rahul, why don't you say?
Son, you have to find out who it was else in your team who called.
And we are taking Shruti out of the shoot.
She's acted enough already now.
Sir, please no. The film
- So how is that our problem?
Sir, what about your big climax scene in the film?
Come, lets go Papa.
- Sir, its a solo performance.
Okay. But you have to finish all these scenes in one day, tomorrow.
After that, Shruti is not going to leave the house.
How will I finish it all in one day, Sir? Please Sir, please, please.
What is this pleases? I'm a heart patient, mind you.
Finish your bloody shooting in one day.
The come for the wedding party, hungry assholes, to eat all the sweets. Lets go!
Papa....let me go, Papa. I have to go.
- Go, child. Go. Live your life. Move forward.
See Sir, no touching. There's a gap.
Shruti, smile more. More.
Is there any scene left? A song?
Can"t you write another scene?
Stop shooting me, Rahul.
I want to work. I don"t want to go home
Shruti, your father will calm down. Next week he will be...
- Next week, what??
Rahul, let"s go
- Not now. Just two minute,
Rahul... - Not now, Sangam
Rahul. Sangam, comeout.
You"ll be back next week. Don"tworry.
Take me somewhere Rahul.
I don"t wantto go. I want to bewith you
What can we do?
Hi! - Hi! Shruti?
- Come. Hurry
I lied saying I hadto visit a sick friend.
Did you pack? - Yes.
No camera, please
Tea or something?
- No, thanks.
Papa, can I interview everyone?
You booked thehotel?
- Yes. Where"s yourdriver?
At the front exit. Your taxi?
- At theback exit.
No. Notthis way.
Look sir, we"re married
This is Shruti. My Simran
Seehow beautiful sheis. Nice, na?
Shelaughs too much
Can"t cook, but feeds me well
You talk too much
- Really? Do I talk too much?
Sir, I loveher and she loves me.
We"re going to have alovelyhome
He"s lying. Hehas kidnapped me from my home.
Promising mearole. He's taking advantage of me in a hotel room.
As a camera print, the film is already annotated by an audience that cheers and bickers, critiques, mutters when the pace slackens and loudly beckons either sex or the next fold in the narrative. It is a flurry of disgruntled viewers that ride into this film, via the cam print, tear it apart and put it together as a different object.
LSD, the film itself is about image making. It is made up of multiple frames piled up one on top of other, jostling, collapsing onto each other. Perhaps that is why our angles of looking are distorted, intimate yet far away, the feet of young lovers, the chin of a boss or editor and so on. This scene slightly evokes Wayward Cloud (Tsai Ming Liang) where the screen is filled with the man's toe slipping into the mouth of the girl. Though not as brave, there are still neon green wrappers, human skin lit by glaring tube light, occasional darkness that is dispelled by a toilet seat.
Mani Kaul on the cinematic object remarks on the unseen outside of a film frame. He says, "The unseen outside of a film-frame is negligible in its evocativeness if compared to what is created upon or within the theatre space, in front of or around an audience." LSD refutes that with its jostling camera frames, if you slip out of one frame, you are caught by another. The student filmmaker is captured in the surveillance cameras and so is the shoot-out in the supermarket. The unseen outside of the film frame has the camera, whether it is the pornographer's, journalist's, the spy cam or the camera for shooting a classy music video. The pirate print too obliquely captures the audience, whose presence is always imagined while making a film, but in this pirate copy, an actual audience presents itself.
It is at this moment amongst the cacophony of male voices that echoes from the audience, that a silhouette of a woman rises from the audience in the love-making scene, to make her way out of her seat and the theater.
I am taking advantage of you? - Sorry. Sorry.
I made you elope with me? You gave me the idea...
(Person in audience) Show something man, to us.
A woman is seen getting up
(Person in audience) Looks like ..
(Person in audience) Whats happening now?
Mrs Shruti Kumar"s first night ofmarriage
(Person in audience) She's hungry.
(Person in audience) Oh sisterfucker ...
Forty-two missed calls
You haveto call him, Shruti.
Rahul, are you mad?
Don"tbecrazy. We"re married now.
What can he do now? Not a thing
You don"t know him
- Nothing will happen
l"ll talk to your father. I'll touch his feet, he will hug me.
This isn"ta film
- Wewon"thidelike thieves
Everyoneloves a lover. Call him.
(Person in audience) Dulhaniya la jayenge (reference to another film)
Film about a Camera
Man with a Movie Camera, which perhaps is the closest to an ancestor that a film like LSD would have, places the object of camera or technology of filmmaking within the film itself. Man with a Movie Camera begins by saying - "This experimental work aims at creating a truly international language of cinema based on its absolute separation from the language of theater and literature…This is a 6 reel record on film, excerpts from a camera operator's diary". The ambition of this film was over-arching and makes one question what has been achieved especially the separation of cinema from other forms and the making of a transnational language. Also whether this is what needs to be achieved, or the collapse of cinema into localities, specificity and audiences is an interesting turn in the possible use of cinema and cameras, since 'Man with a movie camera'.
In many movies, technology especially cameras are a cautionary tale. It is a moment when the film wrenches inwardly, looks at its own guts and eruptions, at all the consequences that it sets afoot, and like a guilty old assassin, lurches off into the rain. In a 1912 film titled the Cameraman's Revenge, a title-card in the silent film says - "Mr. Beetle should not have been surprised that the aggressive grasshopper was a movie cameraman". The grasshopper sets up the camera to look inside a house through a keyhole and this is how Mrs Beetle's affair with an artist-friend is caught by Mr Beetle. The camera even in its initial meanings was not merely an object for creating and showing filmic and epic narratives, but also something that could be personal, akin to surveillance and stealthy presence. The first use of the still camera by a maharaja in India was to take surreptitious pictures of all his lofty guests using the toilet (Wicked Women of the Raj, Coraline Younger).
Red Road, a 2006 film captures the use of CCTV cameras in a suspenseful plot about suspicion and sex. A woman who works for the government and is assigned to watch the live CCTV footage for possible crimes taking place, sees someone who she is interested in for personal reasons. She sets into play the entire government apparatus of watching citizens, for her own secret needs and desires.
The Korean film Oldboy (Park Chan Wook, 2003) warns about television - here the narrator is incarcerated for several years with only television as a constant companion. He says, "Outside a phone booth on a rainy day, if we meet a dangerous man with a violet umbrella, then we must accept television as a friend. The television is both your clock and your calendar, your school and your home, your church, friend and love".
In the first story in LSD, Rahul's only and constant companion and love, is not just the girl but the camera that is an unspeaking but constantly watchful extension of him. In the second story here, Adarsh is suspicious of the camera - it might be his financial salvation, but he is also erotically drawn and frightened by what he can do with it. Erotics and imagemaking are meshed in this second story. In this moment Adarsh draws closest to the camera, but is unable to look at it directly. The camera is simultaneously culpable technology, the girl's watchful yet loving gaze and his own desire.
These movies and many others about cameras or technology, are often about the serendipity and affect that are put into play by the use of the camera.
Homage to Other Films:
If ever a director lost faith that his sly and intertextual references to another film would be lost on an audience, then the loud cacophony in this bootleg copy of LSD should cheer her or him up. Here the boy exclaims that they are dilwalle - lovers and believers, or those who live by the dictates of their heart. Someone in the audience completes the reference by yelling out the name of Aditya Chopra's film "Dilwalle Dulhaniya Le Jayenge"
Bannerjee's first story in LSD explicitly makes reference to Aditya Chopra's famous box-office hit film DDLJ. In one moment the two lovers look directly at the camera and say - Thank you Adi Sir, the girl's name is Simran which is the same as Kajol's in DDLJ and the boy often prefers to call her Simran or says - this is Shruti, my Simran, the boy's name is Rahul as a tribute to Shahrukh Khan's name in countless movies, the name of the student film he makes is a rip-off from DDLJ's song "Mehndi laga ke rakhna"
DDLJ is the film that upset the course of melodramatic cinema in Hindi - that of a violent regressive father who opposed the marriage of passionate lovers, and of villains that should and must be feared, even if they are brothers, cousins or other members of the family. DDLJ almost seemed like a manual on compromise and diplomacy within the family. The boy must win over the approval of the father of the girl, while keeping romance alive and his limbs intact.
Maybe reality is more complicated - there are perhaps marriages that are accepted because of compromise, but there have also been stories of murders, beatings and forced arranged marriage. The family can also be the site of violence, control and heteronormativity. This is what Bannerjee wants to remind us off, by tearing away the glossy sheen of Aditya Chopra's family dramas, to show the horror of a couple in love killed by the girl's father and brother, for disobeying and marrying outside of class and caste. In the film (LSD) it seems almost like the boy and the girl are also seduced by Aditya Chopra's benign vision. They naively believe the father's insincere words, only to be dragged under a bridge and killed. The brutality of the final killing is shocking for its contrast to their touching faith, but also to what we usually expect to see on screen. Our dilwalle or lovers are hacked to death in newspapers, not on celluloid.
Hello! Papa. I got married.
(Person in audience) Will she speak?
(Person in audience) Does she even know how to speak?
(Person in audience) Papa....
(Person in audience) Okay, take off her clothes now
(Person in audience) Put on the AC
(Person in audience) Making us sit in the heat, like this
(Person in audience) At least give us fans
What? Brother, give Papa the
Give him the phone.
I won"t talk to you
Brother, give the phone to him
(Person in audience) Papa has gone
Hello! Yes, papa.
Yes. He"s here
(Person in audience) Its 11 o'clock
- Yes, Papa?
You"ve taken such a big step without telling us
We would never harm you? You"re our children
Thank you, uncle.
What"s your name, son?
Don"t bescared, son. Now we are family
- Rahul. It"s Rahul
You should"vehadtheguts to tell us, yourself.
She"s my only daughter
Uncle, It happened so quickly. Simran...
- Simran? Simran who?
I mean Shruti. l"ll never hurt her. Promise
Tell me where you are.
I"ll send the car for you
No, uncle. We"ll comeon our own
This is not how we celebrate weddings in our family.
They're celebrated with pomp
Come. I"ll throw a grand party for you both
Papa, aren"t you angry?
What usenow after the wedding?
It"s time to celebrate
Where should I send the car?
Hotel Monu Garden
What did I tell you? What did I tell you?
Adi Chopra, sir. Thanks
I don"t know what else to say
You say something...
Comeon. Say something. Say hi
Hi, Aadi sir, l"m Shruti Dahiya
- Kumar. - Oh yes.
Pressed rewind. Hopethe old footageisn"t lost
When we reach, don"t stop begging till father forgives you
I won"t stop for a week
Who"s the new driver?
- I don't know.
What happened? Why did you stop the car?
Come on, buddy. Come outside.
(audience reaction to brother's sudden appearance)
God has made aplace in life for each ofus
Didn't anyone tell you that?
- We let you into our home and you forgot what you are
You road side scum, dog.
(Person in audience) He's killing them
(Person in audience) Is he going to make mince meat of them, bhossadikke?
l"m grateful to my father, mother, brother for accepting us
And whoever"s watching this video. Thanks
Now we"ll always be together always
Is that it?
Can you seduce her?
Let it go
Rashmi, this is Adarsh. He was asking yourname.
He is thereal boss.
Listen... - You seethese new arrangements... It"s all his plan.
He doesn"t like flattery
Is everything good? All okay?
Yes, sir. - Good. Good.
Keep itup. Keep it up.
Any problem? L"ll talk to Lalaji
- I can talk to him myself
She"s very independent-minded
What happened? I primed her for you
Notthis one. The dayshiftbabe
- Oh the day shift girl.
Idiot. - Dayshift babe... - Sonal.
Sorry. My confusion.
She isn"t bad either. Giveher ago
Give me the bloody camera or l"ll shoot
I will shoot you. - Shoot him if you can.
Don"t shout. He"s alive.
Adarsh. - Please.
Adarsh, call theambulance
Shut up! He"s alive
- In theblack diary
I didn"t do it
An ambulance. Hurry!
The All Night Store. On the highway.
Call them fast. - Ya. Ya. Ok. Ok. It"s coming. Five minutes.
Switch it off
Nothing... I'm sorry
Sit here on the chair.
No. I'm good
There"s no onehere. You can sit on thechair.
Thedoctor said if it wasn't for you, he'd bedead
Tell me, didn't the gun scare you?
- I didn't have time to think
Not scared ofa gun? You"re brave
(Person in audience) She'll get scared of your gun (penis)
(Person in audience) This is good, very good
lt"s 4am. Notgoing home?
- I'll wait till daybreak
Your folks will worry
- There's no choice
l'll take you home
- You scared me
Must be my face. Adarsh was asking yourname
He"s Lalaji"s favourite. Ask Sonal her name
What's your name, Sonal?
Hello! - Hello! Hello!
Blue, blue is matching.
- Same to same
Lalaji thoughtmy MBA degree mighthelp his business.
So I stop by
MBAs rule the world
You must earn alot
- Earn? What"s moneybetween friends?
- No l"m finehere
Let"s go out for tea
- Why? Are you embarrassed to haveit here?
Not at all
- Shut up
You weren"t embarrassed taking aloan
Why so coyin front ofMadam?
Sonal, why don"t you...
- Why bother her? You owethemoney
You didn"t use that tone when you took the loan
You"ve no cash, no job etc, etc
So when do you pay?
- Please understand
Listen, Shah Rukh. We"re being polite.
Be a good boy and pay in a week
Or else we"ll yank it out ofyou. Right here in this store.
Madam, don"t trust him. He"s a fraud
He's a con artist, actually.
- Got it?
My friends. An affectionate in-joke
- I noticed the affection
Let's buy you a gift
- Never mind. Save the cash for your friends
You're still a kid.
Do you know what Lalaji got for selling the footage of the shoot-out incident?
He sold it..?
A news channel paid 40,000 forthe footage on a CD.
Come here. See this camera - it is the key to a fortune
A hug and a kiss are worth 10,000
And for a sex scandal you can get 70,000. Easy!
The real stuff. Without telling the girl
Do you understand?
Aren"t you mates with thenightshift girl?
- No, man. She isn't the type
Then teach her
I saw her smiling at you
Forget it! She"s dark-skinned and ordinary.
Dark. Fair. They're all the same naked
Are you game?
How long will you dodge those guys?
She looks sheltered, she'll be easy for you.
Why don"t you smile more often?
Many people will love you if you smile more.
You could star in an ad
You'd be a great model
Why are you lying?
I know l"m not beautiful
- You are beautiful, but you hide it.
Let it out. Flaunt it
Style your hair. See what happens
What will happen?
Wow! You look almost hot
Cut your hair, eh? You beauty queen
Pity, it"s got cuttoo short
Well, it"ll grow back by next year.
l"m off. You"re early today.
Showing off your hair?
We went to see the guy who was shot.
- Adarsh and me
(Person in audience) Sisterfucker
(someone on the phone in the audience)
(person in audience) Total purpose
(cheering) Hail Mother India
(person in audience) For 25 years (possible reference to fifty years of independence)
(person in audience) Zindabaad
(person in audience) Lead the charge
(person in audience) Joota bundle (bundle of shoes)
You're looking nice
Why are you always buying perfume, sir?
- Call me Ankit
l'll haveto keep coming back
- Do you like this one?
Come fordinner, Rashmi
l"m waiting. Come fast.
Don"t encourage those sleaze-balls
You don"t know men
You're a man, too
Did you have a spat with Sonal?
Why? Did shesay anything?
That you don"t have a degree or a job.
Just Lalaji's friend..
She keeps flirtingwith me.
I stayed away. So shetalks rot
I didn"t like what Sonal said about you
You have a great personality.
You'll be good at any job. So why are you here...?
Don't lecture me
You know why l"m here?
Because l"m handsome
(Person in audience) Now he'll hit you with a belt
(Person in audience) Has he gone deaf?
I don't careif you're handsome or have a degree
The first day we met, you didn't flirt with me
You dropped me home like a gentleman
You talk too much.
But your intentions are good
But that seems to be changing
Make something of your life, please
And shut Sonal up for good
I know you can meet any challenge, if you make up your mind
Let"s go for a coffee
- I can't leave
Ok, one minute...
Adarsh. Adarsh. Come here.
My best friend. Shruti
Rahul cast Papa. Now he"s god
- Shruti, no drinking
He's filling in for Papa.
Now come. Now come fast.
Whereto? What happened?
- You drink beer, we have to do secret talk
- He"s so sweet
All good? Need something?
- Ask Adarsh
He said I should look after you
Are you school friends?
I had a schoolmate once.
He"s a sweeper now
Adarsh looks out for you
- He"s just a friend
A friend? Have you seen the way he looks at you
He likes you.
He can't take his eyes off you
How do you like my friend?
- They look sweet together
She thought you were very sweet
- You never told me your father was dead
What's there to say?
- You're very brave
l"m trying to get a job. Lets see.
You look good when you"re quiet
- Why not then...
A litte more right, A kiss on the mouth would've been perfect
Forget the cheek. Get to thereal thing
- Won't this do?
What's wrong with you?
This isn"t a family soap
l've given my word to the buyer
Why play when got no balls?
You falling for her?
- Are you nuts?
I'm not joking, seriously.
You should model
Rashmi, one minute
- He"s always glaring at me
l'll kill him someday
- Hedoesn"thave bad intentions
To hell with Adarsh!
Don"ttalk to him again
Will you protect me from everyone?
You liedto Lalaji too
I did it for me. Not for you
when he foundthebeer cans?
You think l"m hereto
smell the guard"s bad breath?
I keep thinking about you.
You have no time for me
You spend all yourtime spraying perfume on him
I wait for a smile. And
end up getting an earful
Get ajob! Do this.
Do that. L"m trying
What elseshould I do?
Am I not good enough without ajob?
I haven"t washed my cheek
since you kissed melast night
What"s your problem?
Are you allergic to being loved? Well?
(Person in audience) Take photo now
(Person in audience) 15,000 you will get now
(Person in audience) Kamal, take out camera now
Adarsh, the camera is looking.
(Person in audience) The camera is too high
(Person in audience) Now stand up and turn it off
(Person in audience) Ass...
Movean inch and l"ll break your leg
Wow! So he"s back from Russia?
- I didn"t know ifhe"d ever return
GiveAdarsh mywedding invite.
I hear he"s here only at nights
-Hewouldn"t dare come in the daytime
- Don"t you know?
Those goons beat him to pulp in front ofthe shop
They beat Adarsh?
- A royal bashing. With shoes, chappals.
The prince took the loan but wouldn"t payback
You hang outtogether, right? Give him the invite
You look sweet with your new haircut.
Want me to find you ahusband?
Or will you do it yourself? Here?
See you later. Okay, bye.
You usedto smile a lot. What"s wrong?
Tell mewhat"s wrong
Had your coffee?
Hi! - Had your coffee? Now get lost.
- I know. He"s your regularcustomer
- My tone! Motherfucker
Who thehell are you?
Is this your shop?
Who"s this guy? L"m callingthepolice. Who is he?
Sir, sir Please.
Decent girls don"t model
Why humour him?
What happened? Its not a big deal.
- But it is a big deal
I told you not to talk to him
- Who are you to stop me?
Shall I tell you?
Quit this job
- I don"t like you working here
And who"ll paythebills?
- I will.
- Let"s getmarried
- What"s theproblem?
I"ll earn. You"ll stay at home
Earning means working.
Not useless talk
You dark, skinny bitch
Look at you. Want to be amodel, eh?
And l"m useless? Shall I tell Lalaji aboutthebeer?
You"ll betheuseless one
(Person in audience) .. lecture.. (inaudible)
(Person in audience) We've been sitting here for 1 hour
Living in a gutter. Reaching for the stars
The valiant knight saving womankind
You wait like a fool while the birds have pecked your field dry.
(Person in audience) Make an MMS of this
(Person in audience) Take my phone if you need it
(Person in audience) Look here, sisterfucker. I've been sitting here with my camera open for so long
(Person in audience) That sex scene is not coming only
(Person in audience) Now this boy is at it again
(Person in audience) He has ..drive.
(Person in audience) This one is fail
(Person in audience) No, he'll take it ..
(Person in audience) Make a picture of this only
(Person in audience) Make a picture with us
Other Videos of Men - Being gay or doing masti
The chatter amongst the audience members too is about cameras, about lending, using phones, making MMS videos and porn videos. In a curious almost pornographic metaphor, one person in the hall says - kabse camera khol ke bhetha hu or how long have i sat with my camera open, as if it is akin to having his pants open.
At the end, the frustrated audience, waiting, by their own admission, with dicks in their hands, is forced to offer themselves as possible images for the camera. "Hamari picture bana de" (make a picture of us) refers to the countless youtube and other videos of young men touching and molesting each other, and is a sly acknowledgement that so far the audience has had more masti or sexual camaraderie with each other and with the film, than any of the characters in the film.
Rashmi. We haveto go now
We must go at once
- What happened?
Our friends are no more
Are you listeningto me?
Rashmi, webetter go. Rashmi. Rashmi. Control.
Control please, Rashmi.
(Person in audience) And she sat down
(Person in audience) What is happening in English?
(Person in audience) Say it in Hindi, yaar.
(Person in audience) Ouch.. what the fuck
(screeches from audience)
- What do you want?
(Person in audience) Louda
Remember Shruti? My friend
Theonewho said you were very sweet
(Person in audience) She's dead now
Shewas the onewho said you liked me
(Person in audience) Say it fast, stupid girl
Adarsh, don"t go, please
- What happened?
Theylooked so happy in thehospital that day
They went to thetemple from there
Rashmi, what is it?
They gotmarried and wentto ahotel
Her father"s car picked them up thatnight
Her old driver complained to the police a week later
They followed thedriver"s hunch.
Near thehighway, under abridge..their bodies were found
They werechopped into pieces and shoved into aplastic bag
And buried in the ground
She was the one who first told me you liked me
That you looked out for me
That you couldn"t take your eyes offme
Why don"t you look atmeanymore?
Did I do anythingwrong?
(cheering) Total Total
(Person in audience) Idiot, say or do something
Tell me, what did I do wrong?
Why did you shout at me?
(People in audience) The bird has floowwwwn/
udh jawe chidiyan phudh
Don"t ever leaveme. Please. Please.
Get Shruti back
I love you
(Person in audience) 1, 2, 3
(Person in audience) 5, 5 is coming
(Person in audience) Make it work
(Person in audience) Everyone take out their (penis)
(Person in audience) Put it in the hand of the guy next to you.
(Person in audience) Remove the t-shirt
(Person in audience) 1,2,3 - take it off
(Person in audience) 50,000 full!
Sisterfucker, motherfucker don't put it off.
Adarsh, the camera
(applause for not putting off camera)
(Person in audience) Really. We can still see..
(Person in audience) Bring the mattress
(Person in audience) stupid
(Person in audience) Is he going to jerk off?
(Person in audience) Now she'll be cold
(Person in audience) This girl has been seduced
(Person in audience) 70,000
(Person in audience) 80,000
(Person in audience) 10,000
(Person in audience) 162,000
(Person in audience) Its over
(Person in audience) No, its bufferring...
(Person in audience close to camera) bleedy idiots
(Person in audience) Put on your bluetooth - you'll get it.
Excuseme. - Yes.
- Is Lalaji here?
Let me check
- Weren"t you theone who was shothere?
You"rethewatchman? Meter down.
- Yes, sir
Rashmi told meabout you
- I was thewatchman.
Noneoftheold employees arehereany longer
I called on Rashmi"s number.
Asking her salary to becollected
You know whather mother said?
That she doesn"t know any Rashmi
I said: "Butshe"s your daughter"
Shesaid shehad no daughter and banged thephonedown
I still have Rashmi"s money
They did ithere
(Person in audience) You can also do it
Sex, the thing you saw on theCD
You saw the footage?
- I don"t watch dirty pictures
(Person in audience) Doesn't look like you won't
My cousin told me it"s all over thenet
They call it"TheStoreScandal"
(Person in audience) Put a phone call to Pandara. Lets download it
Lots of downloads. Hugely popular
(Person in audience) Your own brother. You can watch it.
What about the boy?
- Boys areboys
(Person in audience) Don't burn a hole in the screen
Hestopped coming here
I hear he"s getting married
Look. This was thecamera
Sir, can"thelp but say
First you gotshot, then the sex scandal
By God, the sales have gone through the roof
(Person in audience) What happened?
(Person in audience) Now dhoka (betrayal) will begin
Other Videos of Men - Being Beaten up:
The range of videos that are available online, especially on Youtube, range from the candid moment captured between men and their camaraderie in a hostel, the seduction of an unknowing girl, stripping a girl, videos allegedly in changing rooms and cyber cafes and so on. In the midst of these semi-erotic videos, kaand and other scandalous videos is the odd fascination with the video of a man, whether a husband, brother, son-in-law and so on, being beaten up by a woman. Sometimes even a 2 or 3 second clip of a very loud smack on the head too makes it into this category. Obviously there exists a schadenfreude-like-pleasure or visceral enjoyment of videos of disrobing of dignity and humiliation of other men. In LSD, this odd type of video is placed, almost without explanation, between the story about the girl who gets duped into a pornographic sex video and the last story about a dancer-girl who will use her wiles and seduce a pop-star for a sting video. The previous story ends with Rashmi being visible last time via an amateur sex video online, and then she disappears from the store where she works and ostensibly from the lives of everyone else. The tenuous friendship she has with the journalist who obviously sympathizes with her or likes her is also disrupted by the leak of the video.
At that point the video of the anonymous shrieking woman violently beating up a man seems appropriate and just the retaliatory, vengeful and even feminist violence that is needed. Oddly this bootleg copy too does something to the men whose voices are heard throughout the camera print. Instead of the expected exposure, either physically or emotionally, of a woman in a pornographic or other kind of video clip, here the men, their motivations, behaviour and even thoughts are revealed. Behind the anonymous facade offered by the movie screen that we are watching alongside with these men, the circulation of this pirate print does a tiny bit to balance the scales of who is revealed and exposed via the camera.
Ready, Camera, Action, or the gesture of film-making:
"Raising a camera to one’s face has effects no one can calculate in advance."
Anne Carson, Autobiography of Red
Giorgio Agamben in 'Notes about gestures' says that the moving image or the gesture, rather than the still frame, is the basic unit of cinema. Gilles Deleuze too thinks of films as moving sections or pictures in motion, rather than static images. Images are then lost frames of a film; they are mute and under a spell that needs to broken, and "cinema leads images back into the realm of gesture."
In LSD, the most basic gesture seems to be that of shooting with the camera, or even in some instances of wearing it. The gesture is pressing record, capturing the moment - of holding the camera between the events and yourself. In this particular instance, the camera is hanging on Mrignaina's neck and she is aware and nervous because of its presence.
Gesture is "neither production nor enactment, but undertaking and supporting", but oddly that of holding a camera is indeed something between production and action, something is produced but it is also merely an act, a way to greet the world, with a camera in between - a prosthetic technological device that mediates. To some, like Rahul in the first story in LSD, holding the camera is almost natural and inevitable, while Mrignaina is continuously aware that she has to produce a sting video via the presence of the camera around her neck.
Agamben in relation to the history of Europe and silent cinema remarks on how it is as if a society that is losing its gestures, is simultaneously trying to capture and fix them via cinema, transmute them into destiny. LSD captures literally the gesture - the visceral nature of the relation between us and the camera and the frenzy of making images that move.
Go and saythatto your sister.
Ma"am, I am sorry. - Will
you ask thatto your mother?
Ma"am, I am sorry. - How dare you!
Bastard! L"m arespectable woman
Why did you jump on the net? Why did you jump on my fishing net?
- I lost my balance
How you can just...
- I just slipped and... - Why here and now?
Who pays for my fishing netandthefish?
- Anyonecan fall
Don"t flash yourmoney at me. This is government water for fishing.
Don"tlose your balanceagain
Let"s go to a doctor
The chemicals in the water will ruin yourskin
What"s wrong with you?
Savingtheworld? Why stop me?
I wantedto die. Why did you interfere?
You wantedto die?
- No. I was practicing diving
I saved yourlifeand you...
- Thank You!
Is that how you thank me?
- I don"thave anymoney
That"s why I am folding hands.
- Who wants your money?
What then? Sex?
I don"t accept favours.
You saved mylife, thank you
Now ifyou wantsex, then take me wherever you want...
A blow job? A fuck?
Wheredo you live?
What"s your name?
Mrignaina Biswas. I ran away from home.
No money. No house. Nothing. Happy?
I got everything but your name
- Mrignaina. Naina
Why commit suicide?
- A rabid dog bit me
That's no reason
- Waittill you hear thedog"s name
Know Loki Local?
- The pop singer?
"You"re cutewhen you"re naked"
Veg dumplings. Hurry
The drowning has mademehungry
Serve us. Quick
So what about Loki?
- He promisedto launch me in his music video
Launch? - Launch.
A launch in a Loki Local"s music video. You know what that means?
You know his girls, Nilofer, Ruhi....Dolly Baby.
They"re superstars today
They charge millions for alive show
- So you"rea dancer?
No. A doctor.
Can"t you tell bymy figure that l"m a dancer?
Ok, ok, right...
What happened next?
The usual. He asked me to compromise a little
You slow or something?
Don"t you get it?
I told him this isn"t my style
But hecouldn"t wait. So impatient
A Russian slut got themusic video.
Hespat me out
Whitepussy chasing dog
What"s this? Chilly soup?
You want to get even?
A sting? You mean hidden camera stuff? Like Tehelka
- The Minister"s secretary accepted abribe, caught on camera. My story
My camera toppled the government
Rings a bell?
Remember the Miss Meerut scandal?
- On yes. "Beauty Queen turned Whore"
Why are you whispering?
- She committed suicide, right?
Naina. Want to teach Loki a lesson?
Shall wejoin forces and do a sting on him?
Come, come. Now make it very clear.
Sex in return for a music video
l'll wait here. Best of luck
Don't thank. Now go
This evening l'll take you to this nice place...Bollywood crowd.
- Sounds great.
- Fifth floor.
You're the girl with the difficult name. Come dear.
Come, dearest. Letmetake you among the stars
My babyis looking hot
Come, Naina. Come.
Come on in, child. Comeon.
Irina meet Naina, my lndian beauty
Naina meet Irina
Everybody meets everybody in Loki"s
International temple of love
He"s mad like this all time. Oh, watch out
There's sauceon thefloor
I told you there's sauce on thefloor
Naina fell on thesauce. Did you see her music video?
She was a fruit seller in Moscow, and now a superstar
She waited for me to get inspired
You were in such ahurry
Yes to speed. No to haste
You made me wait
- A little more won't harm
Meat is tender when cooked along time
How about a joint video with you and her?
Baby, comehere, sit. - Joint?
Come. Come. Joint. You, me and her.
Baby, don"ttouch. Don"t touch. First ask.
Love x one. Love xtwo. Love x three.
Climb thelove tree
Well, baby? Want to try?
I want a solo music video
- What happened? Did hehit you?
I said don"t ask
- But what happened? Naina. Naina.
Why did you leave?
- He wants a threesome
Naina, I need this story
- Why is he glued to that Russian?
What"s so special about her?
- What Russian?
He didn"t look at me.
I'll never danceagain. That whore broke my leg
Your leg will mend
Let me stay here tonight
I'll leave tomorrow
Don't go drowning again
Something wrong with me?
Even when you"re drunk...you don"t fancyme
(Person in audience) maybe he's big hearted
(Person in audience) He's fat, the ass
(Person in audience) Get on his face
Loki ignores me too
Am I so plain?
(Person in audience) You only show him
(Person in audience) The devil has awoken
(Person in audience) The snake (penis) is waking up
Loki's in town for three more days
l'll do as you say
Let"s try again the last time?
(Person in audience) Become fair then
Imagine l"m Loki. Start.
(Person in audience) Break her legs
Why are you laughing?
- You? Loki? LIke this?
Wassup, baby, Naina?
- I'm good
What's wrong? Say something
- Like what?
"Hi. Hello. Let"s havesex."
How elsedo we get the footage?
How's life, darling?
- What's lifewithout you?
Didn't you miss me?
- This is good. Better
(Person in audience) Thats good, thats good
(Person in audience) Now kick him
(Person in audience) The mad chick is laughing
Naina, you... Stop laughing so much.
A sting is about winning trust.
Nobody opens up without it
(Person in audience) Sisterfucker
(Person in audience) Its going to her lap
(Person in audience) Whats with the camera?
It took three months to trap the Minister"s secretary
- Why are you buzzing around me?
Naughty girl! Your camera is on
Sorry. Sorry. Very sorry.
"You look good naughty.
You look like a nice girl, a tender shoot."
Answer the phone
- How's your leg? Need anything?
Nothing. Just meet me
lt's been ages since I heard you sing
- Watch me on TV
I want to see you play the guitar
- You me and the guitar
Your voice is so lovely
Everything about me is lovely
I only had you and you've forgotten me too
- My dear...
l've worn out my fingers dialing your number
This is very bad.
I don't want to shoot any more.
Stay away from me for an hour
Shall I shoot you?
I never load my gun
You know my temper.
I shoot someone. I hang
- You shouldn't get angry
You look handsomewhen you're happy
- You don't give me what I want. You can make me happier
Sir, what do you want?
See my built-in bar? Scotch
No one to share with
I understand, Sir. You're lonely
I am also lonely, sir
- You're the one running away.
Check this out, automatic.
Where can I go, sir?
You're my guide
Listen to your guide then
- Try me out
Look. A wash basin. Two
Bathroom. Hot and cold
The only make-up van with a bedroom
But it's empty
Check if l have a fever?
- You're always hot, sir
You are standing here, and making me burn
You were saying, sir?
You want a music video?
I'll give you a video
You want a music video?
- Want, sir. Want.
Then come to me.
Why bother with stupid auditions?
Better to fuck one, the king ofpop than 200
- Ok, sir.
It's the chemistry that shows on camera, the music video will be a hit
Come on. Sit down. Be comfortable.
(Person in audience) Remove her panties
(Person in audience) Open your legs
Stay with me. I'll protect you
No one will touch you.
You are with Loki. No one has
the guts fucking with you.
I'll wrap you in satin.
Like a doll
What do you say?
Give me your hand, Naina
(Person in audience) This one is a lesbian
Where did you find her, Prabhat?
Are you a professional?
(Person in audience) She's come from G. B. Road
No, Just a friend
"l'll wrap you in satin."
His career will be over when this is broadcast
"l'll wrap you in satin."
It won"t sustain, ma"am.
- You think so?
The casting couch is old hat.
It won't survive the weekend
Won"t survive? But he"s India"s top pop star
Thats why its not good enough
- Why are you butting in?
One minute, Prabhat
So what if he hit on her?
What's his image anyway?
"You"re cutewhen you"re naked"
He sings such songs.
- Any sex footage?
Miss Meerut, all over again
- Try a double sting. Pre-denial, post-denial
This story breaks. Loki denies it
- Denies it? But it"s all on camera
He"ll say it"s fictitious.
She"s a lying slut
One more sting and we nail him
Let"s go, Naina
- One minute
- What if he offers you money to buy the footage?
- Ma"am, itwould beillegal.
Onesecond, Prabhat. Sit down
Naina, this is what you do.
We alreadyhave this footage
Meet Loki again. On camera
Tell him about this footage.
Make him buyit from you
- That"s blackmail
He must offer you money on camera
Bring us that footage. That"ll be the sting ...ofthe century
Get it? He"s seen buying footage thathe claimed is fictitious
A perfect scoop. It"ll begreat.
How will that help?
- Talk shows. Interviews
Crying. Whining. Apologizing.
We can stretch it for a season
"See how cute naked Loki looks" Not bad.
- And then?
Nothing. That"s it
I'll film you from the other table.
The mike"s on you
Why didn"t you tell them that
we havethesex footage?
What happened with Miss Meerut?
- I pretendedto beher client.
She was undressing. My camera jammed
That's what all thetaunts areabout
Why do you listen to her?
Your editor. That witch
- Because l'm useless
Useless? You toppled the government
You unravel the truth.
You deserve an award
Sure. My website was shut down.
One of my guys went to jail.
CBI is after another one. I was prosecuted
But you did it for the country
The country wants prime time entertainment, like you
You can't bear me being touched by someone else, na?
Where is your friend?
-Sit down. Be patient.
That's beyond me
She's on for a threesome?
Your namedid thetrick
Call her. Find out whereshe is
- I will
First tell me what we did in...your trailer the other day?
I gave you a kissy
- I deflowered you
- You are fun. Call her now.
First tell me, when do we make the music video?
You're a broken record
- You'll get broken too
You yellow teethed, mole faced monkey.
- On camera
The channel is after you.
Know what a sting is?
Theworld will seehow you treated me
Demanding sex for music video
- Only l can save you. Now listen
I want yournext three music videos. Mealone
Take the tapes back after the music videos areaired
Cut it out!
I "ll sayit"s phony
Barking like the dog you are, Loki Local
We"rebeing recorded even now
Givemethecamera, you slut
- Let go!
Let go. - Naina. Naina.
- Who are you?
He"s from thechannel. Don"t
givehim thebag. L"ll handle him.
Naina, what are you saying?
- Keep out ofit, Prabhat
His gun is never loaded. Don"t worry
- Stop it. Why are you fighting here?
Adarsh, call theambulance
Thenumber"s thereat the counter.
He"s alive... He"s alive...
He"s alive... We"ve called theambulance
Oh God, don"t let him die. O God!
Your camera and hard disk
You had the Miss Meerut footagetoo
Why didn"t you airit?
Now I'll show how you blackmail for a sting operation.
- Are you two related?
(Person in audience) She gets on his gaaand/ She's his kaand (scandal)
Related by hugging
- An enemy
She talks too much -
Wheredo you live?
The finale song is the music video for the theme song for the film LSD. Only a part is shown here
" I'll shoot you, then I will save your life"